At dinner last night with a friend…
Me: So my last paycheck comes in, and it was three hundred dollars shy of my rent payment. So I pulled $300 out of nowhere and then my cell phone bill came due for $100 and then, in the last ten days I’ve spent about a hundred bucks in groceries and what not. Now I’m $500 behind before I even received my next check. And while it’s great that I’m talking to my parents again, they now want me to come home for Christmas which is like a $400 plane flight, $200 for boarding the dog, $50 for bags, possibly not working that week. AAAAAAAHHHH! I know if I asked my parents for the money, they’d give it to me, but at the same time, there would be this whole air of disappointment the whole time I was there. “This is our daughter Ana. She’s should be supporting us at this age, but she couldn’t afford to make this trip because she’s too lazy to just suck it up and get a real job. Oh well, at least we have two children who are financially stable.”
Friend: Tell me about it. I just feel so overwhelmed right now. My admin quit. I’ve got a hearing tomorrow in Texarkana and another one in Austin next week. I just wish I had someone to help me out a little bit.
Me: Really? You were paying the admin $10/hour, right? You want me to do some filing for you?
F: For $10/hour? Isn’t that insulting?
Me: I dunno. We could hang out. I could make a little money. You could get stuff done.
F: Gah, that might be awesome. I just want enough time to clean my house right now.
Me: OMG, I love cleaning houses! Can I do that too?
F: Ana, I couldn’t let you clean my house. That’s just… I don’t know. Clean my house?
Me: It’s a stress reliever for me.
F: It’s too bad that you don’t have an interest in litigation because I’ve got clients approaching me like crazy right now.
Me: Yeah, I think I’d rather clean your toilets for $10/hour.
F: Well, I think we could set something up to work for you until you find your way. As much as I hate for you to do it, I need both a secretary and a housecleaner.
Me: I’m so stoked!
F: You are an odd girl.